At the Bottom of the Cliff

Dear My Toy Garden Friends,

     A year ago now I stood atop a cliff with my toes hanging over the edge.  Behind me a journey of steps sure and straight at times and wandering and faint at other times. But each with a forward purpose guided by a higher power.   As I lifted my head, I saw an endless horizon.  Far below, a bottom I couldn’t see or know what was waiting there. A breeze that was faint months before was now whistling past me lifting my hair in ever changing arcs around my head.  My heart, while racing a bit, was steady.  It was time, I was sure, to take the next step.  This one was to be a different from the ones behind me. This one was to be off the edge of the cliff.
   And step off that cliff I did and fell, fell, fell.  You, my dear My Toy Garden friends, were there with me through the crazy journey of last year.  Thank you for all your kind words and support! Know that I miss you and think of you often.  I've now landed at the bottom of that cliff and wanted to share the recent and next steps of my journey with you in this one last newsletter.
    June, July, August brought wave after wave of there's a buyer!  Oh, hmm, nope.  There's a buyer!  Oh, hmmm, nope.  In early August, I was told by the landlord that he had a potential tenant who, if they signed the lease, would take over the space early September.   That news triggered several weeks of clearing the space to the walls.  Every shelf, every paper clip, every post it note, every curling ribbon I'd brought into the space had to be removed.  With each piece, a piece of my heart to be sure.  I followed the advice of a dear friend before disassembling everything and sat down in the dark of the space one night with a candle and a bottle of wine and said goodbye.  I slowly walked through the store, touching each piece and let waves of memories wash over me.  The wiggly faces at story time, the grandpa who loved science things, the mom whose child struggled academically and loved coming to chat, the amazing staff, the children with a few hard earned dollars in their hands ready to get what they'd eyed for so long, the birthday buckets filled, the events we held.... sooooo many great memories!!
    That was an incredible difficult period but one of great healing as well.  The new tenant didn't materialize. All the fixtures found new homes.  Some at the Carmel Library, some in a new toy store in Chicago, some at Lily's school, some to a food shelter.  The year has been an exercise in trust.  Trust in God's greater plan for me.  I have felt his steady hand guiding me through the year.  Nudging me when I've wanted to dig my heels in, cradling me when I've needed the strength.  I entered the journey of My Toy Garden as an unbeliever.  I leave more sure than ever of God's presence and abundant blessings.  This new year begins with incredible possibilities ahead and I can't wait to see what He has planned!  If you have questions and would ever like to chat with me about faith, I invite you to reach out to me.
      My work with Wildtree has continued to give me great opportunities to help others with taking steps toward healthier eating and/or making meal time more manageable giving them time and stress relief.  Two things I love to help with!  It has provided us income to pay the monthly rent that has continued to be due.  (Praise God that a new tenant officially takes over the space as of today!!  Painting with a Twist begins their build out in the space and expects to open soon.)  If our paths have not yet crossed on the Wildtree side, I'd be honored to work with you.  A hint of something magical has peeked into my world as well.  I look forward to conversations about that in the next few weeks to see where that might lead.
    So, my feet have landed safely on the ground at the bottom of the cliff.  There have been caves to curl up in and take the long nap of a hibernating bear.  There have been cool pools to float in looking up to the sky in wonder and awe.  There have been cactuses with sharp prickles to contend with.  There has been a path that led to my return home for the holidays for the first time in 20 years.  My stepfather passed away in May and I'm so thankful for the time I now have to reconnect with my family.  Below is a picture of my mom and I in her kitchen.  Proof that miracles do happen!
    Ahead, there are flat plains and mountains to traverse with dark woods to get through.  There are people to meet and help along the way.  I'm ready for the challenges and the journey ahead.  More than ever.  All we can do is trust and take the steps were are meant to take today knowing that they will lead us exactly where we need to be.  No need to worry.  Happy new year my friends!  May our paths cross again.
 
Sincerely,
Janet Pillsbury
janetwildtree@gmail.com
317-564-8204 (home)
317-600-8882 (cell)

Almost the End?

Dear My Toy Garden Friends,

It’s been climbing.  It’s been falling.  It’s been twisting and turning.  It’s been slowly inching up another hill only to plummet 6 feet before climbing slowing again.  And now, it’s stalled in a tunnel of darkness.

Summer is the time for roller coasters and what a coaster ride we have been on at My Toy Garden. For those of you who have been following along on this journey, you know that we announced April 10 that due to the needs of my family, we were planning to sell My Toy Garden and if a buyer did not step forward by the end of May, we would close the store.  My Toy Garden has been an intertwined part of my heart for the last 3  years and so that decision was one made slowly, with great deliberation and announced with a deep sigh.  The store has thrived in its 3 years and our customer base has grown quickly and has become like family.  Although there were frowns, sagged shoulder and tears, I appreciated that many of you understood that my children and my marriage needed to come before the store.

April came and went.  May began and the staff wrapped up their journeys on the 2nd Saturday.  I stayed on for four more days to clear out the last of the inventory.  I had always felt the store would sell and, while I did begin to have doubts that it really would in those last few days, lo and behold, at 4 pm on the last Tuesday, a man walked in and was interested in buying the store.  

We have talked and waiting and talked and waited all summer long.  At times, signing the closing documents seemed a day or two away and others, weeks away.  At this time, I am letting go of that possibility with him.  I also said I would not sell the store unless I felt it was the right owner who would continue it on with love, integrity and with a passion to help families.   So…here’s where we are…time to decide.

Do we sell the fixtures and close it forever?  Perhaps.  I’ve decided to send out the word before making that step to see who is out there….one of you?  Someone you know?  Who would love to turn the lights back on at a turnkey, beloved community toy store?  Everything is in place and ready to go.  The new owner would simply place orders with my guidance and the shelves would once again dance with possibilities.  Please share this newsletter with those you know and maybe, just maybe My Toy Garden will continue on.   Interested in knowing more about the store itself?  Contact me at toyladyjanet@gmail.com or 317-600-8882.  Interested in the financials?  Contact my broker, Dick Hester, at 317-496-3503 or rhester@indianabusinessadvisors.com.  If enough of you read this and share this, maybe, just maybe My Toy Garden will continue on.  Thank you truly from the bottom of my heart for all who have supported my family.  It is such a bittersweet time for us.

With much love,
Toylady Janet

My Word of the Year

Dear My Toy Garden Friends,

Who knew such power could be found in a pizza place? Surely not I. My friend, Mary Kaye had invited me to a new adventure of hers and the location she choose was a meeting room at Donato's Pizza. Who knew? What happened that night has played a major role in my life decisions of the last few months. But before we go there, let me tell you a bit about Mary Kaye.

This woman is one of those women you never forget meeting even it is was for just a brief moment of time. She is always wearing something with a splash of color that announces her arrival and makes dark clouds hide in shame. Her sincere smile draws you in and you know you are in the presence of someone special. Her zest for life is huge and her love for others is a driving passion in her life. In one visit, you are likely to be laughed with, cried over and have her eyes connect with yours in simple understanding. She is one of the craziest people I know and I adore her!

Her new adventure was called the Word of the Year Project. Have you had a word or phrase that when you heard it, it popped out from the others around it? A word that when you heard it, it rang through you to your toes? A word that continued to whisper through your actions for days, weeks, months to come? A word that you needed to pay attention to? The goal of this new adventure was to help people identify what their word is and then to help them create a piece of art that captures the essence of that word. Mary Kaye was just the person to lead us through.

After some quiet meditation steps to center our thoughts and some other guided imagery activities, the word that lit on my shoulder was just the word I've needed this year. Patience. Oh so not an easy word though is it? It is only through focus on this word that the events of My Toy Garden have unfolded and led me to where I am now. Patience is truly paying off now!

So where am I now, you are asking? I so appreciate the stalking of the store Facebook page and the messages asking for updates. It's an exciting time for My Toy Garden! The man who appeared that Tuesday afternoon and I have meet several more times since that day. He is still very interested in buying the store and having it remain as much the same as possible. Let's all say, "Yeah!" He had been doing planning to open a store in Fishers when he realized that it might be the better option to buy a store that is already all put together and has a fabulous customer base. Smart idea, right? We are working through the details of things and are hoping to announce the official sale of the store within the next week or two. That means My Toy Garden will reopen this summer...one day very soon! Can you believe it?! God is amazing! Thank you again for all your support! Stay tuned for reopening news soon!

The agreement with my husband was that when the store sold, I get to go on an all inclusive beach vacation for a week by myself. Oh, pinch me please! It will only seem real when I sink my toes in the sand there. Now I'm pondering where....thoughts to share with me on that? Comment below!

Flashlight in the Darkness

Dear My Toy Garden Friends,

Friday was the day the tears began and fell through the weekend. May 9th was a date I'd had in mind for weeks and weeks. On May 9th I'd know I'd told myself. On May 9th, I'd know what the next steps for My Toy Garden would be.

For months I've felt like I'm surrounded by pitch black darkness. The kind of darkness you can taste...that presses against your eyes in an invisible blindfold. In my hands is a small flashlight that shows me a tiny bit. Enough light to show me just one more step to take. I've been blindly following this path wondering where it will lead and trying hard not to worry. Trying hard to trust that His plan is always the best one. The post it on my desk says, "Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, And a light onto my path." I've uttered it many times a day for the last few months.

My steps are quickening right now as I even more tightly focus on today and today alone. Friday, May 9th, came and went leaving me with the feeling that perhaps His plan is for the store to close. My Toy Garden was created in a whirl of magic that sparkled on it's walls for the last 3 years. Maybe, just maybe, the purpose for which it was created has been fulfilled. Tears flowed for four days as I struggled with wanting my plans to be THE plans in my constant battle for control. Perhaps you have those battles too?

Then at 4 pm yesterday a man came into the store. A man who had been here a month ago in the early stages of the clearance sale. A man who told me he had been planning to open a toy store in Fishers. "You know," he said. "I've been thinking. Rather than create a store from scratch, it might make lots more sense for me to look at buying this one." Um...yup! I totally agree!

So the conversations begin and my flashlight continues it's search one step at a time. In a blink that light can land on a pair of shoes that might, just might, allow the store to continue to on. There is still time for other pairs of shoes to step onto the path but not much. I plan to begin to sell the fixtures very soon. (If you have had your eye on any bookcases, tables or other pieces, they might be yours next week.) Now is the time to think who do you know that has had a dream to own a toy store? Invite them to contact me and we can chat. Today, today...where will my path lead to today... Thank you so much for being part of this journey! I will so miss the many conversations I've had with you!

Free Falling

    Almost 3 weeks ago now I stood atop a cliff with my toes hanging over the edge.  Behind me a journey of steps sure and straight at times and wandering and faint at other times. But each with a forward purpose guided by a higher power.   As I lifted my head, I saw an endless horizon.  Far below, a bottom I couldn’t see or know what was waiting there. A breeze that was faint months before was now whistling past me lifting my hair in ever changing arcs around my head.  My heart, while racing a bit, was steady.  It was time, I was sure, to take the next step.  This one was to be a different from the ones behind me. This one was to be off the edge of the cliff.
    So step I did.  One last exhale and my finger pushed send launching the “I Have Something to Tell You” newsletter to your inboxes.  No returning to the ledge.  Trusting that this step was certain.  For the last 3 years, the My Toy Garden journey has felt one far beyond my doing on my own but one guided by a higher power.  As sure as I was to begin the journey, I am sure that the leap off of the cliff was the right step too.  A time to trust in a greater plan than I could ever make on my own.
    So now here I am….falling…falling…falling….  For days now….falling…. falling…  To my surprise though, I am calm.  I am peaceful.  I am happy.  I am not sure how this fall will end but I am sure that all will be as it is meant to be.  The picture of my nephew below has resonated in my thoughts.  I have felt since last October when I first listed the business for sale privately, that it will sell. That it will continue with a new owner who has the time and talent to maintain and take it to a new level.  To make the next dreams I have for it reality.  But who?  I can see the seeds that were strewn about years ago blossoming and growing into a beautiful garden.  In the center is something missing.  It’s time to find the centerpiece that will begin the next season of the store.  I need your help to find it.
     My business broker has met with a woman who would be a wonderful new toy lady.  She is someone who wants to keep the store as it is and sprinkle more seeds to grow it.  She is someone with the time, talent and enthusiasm to take over.  She is working on the financial pieces of it and that’s where you come in.  I feel that it’s not one person I’m looking for but two perhaps:  one to run the store and one to invest in the store.  I believe I have found one.  Now I need to find the other.  Who do you know that is ready to make a difference to families in the Carmel community and partner to keep it open? I feel it is one of you or someone you know that we are looking for.  Please share the press release below anywhere you can to help us find an investor or a new owner.  Time is running short as the shelves empty.  I suspect in another 2-3 weeks the shelves will be bare of almost.   All things truly are possible though.  I believe.  If you or anyone you know has questions, please let me know.
      I think I see the bottom coming clearer and my parachute beginning to open.  I’m looking.  I’m listening.  I’m trusting.  And praying.  What cliff are you standing at the edge of? Be brave.  Listen for guidance and if you hear that your next step  is to step off, then step off and know that you will be caught somehow, someway.  The way is not for you to know.  Trust.  Thank you for being part of this journey.  It’s going to be an interesting next few weeks!

The Journey

      It started off innocently enough….a postcard in a gift shop with a picture of an emerald green lake surrounded by a lush forest.  Green…hmmmm… curious..interesting color for a lake.  The picture invited me to step closer, bend and peer, intrigued.  Where did that say this lake was?  At the top of a dormant volcano?  One that was accessible by foot?  The entrance to the trail started behind the gift shop?  It was more than my gypsy spirit could resist so hiking shoes donned; off we went in search of the elusive green lake.

    The beginning of the journey filled our eyes with plants that must have come from Dr Seuss’s imagination….shapes and sizes not found in Indiana.  Bark in camouflage stripes of light green, bright green and creamy almond.  An giant army of leaf cutter ants steadfastly carrying their hard earned payloads over the riverbank to their home in an endless line we watched for several breathless minutes.  With a start like that, my gypsy soul longed to see what lay ahead.  

   The terrain began to turn upward gently and the tree trunks grew a bit thicker. The thickening branches thinned the sunlight streaming down.  Ferns covered the ground with their curling fingers beckoning us forward.  The roots of the trees twisted and peeked through the soil in rivulets.  30 minutes later, the roots grew thicker and more challenging to step over.  The canopy became a floating carpet of green allowing peeks of sunshine to filter through.  Another 45 minutes later and the climb became quite steep with steps being methodically taken.  Place one boot thigh high up on a root and....deep breath...uuuuuuuppppp.  Whew.  Repeat.  Repeat. Repeat.  Repeat.  I became a human fountain of sweat.  Another 45 minutes of sheer upward focus refusing to quit now but determined to see the journey through.  And there....there is was....the green lake!!  Amazing!!!

As I've reflected on the past three years of the My Toy Garden journey, I've been reminded of this day in Costa Rica years ago.  Creating and running My Toy Garden has been a ton of work.  Many, many late nights.  Many, many decisions to be made and parts to juggle.  Days, weeks taken one slow but giant step at a time....uuuuuppppp!   And along the way...wondrous things to behold making it totally worthwhile!  So many special people I've met and had the pleasure to help on so many different levels.  The busy swarms of children who have spent many a happy day coming to play and learn and enjoy.  The meaningful conversations sparked by something found in a newsletter.  It's the journey I was meant to take.  Now that I'm at the top of the mountain...looking at that miracle of a green lake.. having accomplished so much, it's time to begin the journey down.  The next few weeks will be challenging but a long rest is just ahead.  I do hope that we meet on the pathways ahead for us both.  It's been an honor to serve you!

I Have Something to Tell You

Dear My Toy Garden Friends,

      I have something to tell you.  Those words do have a way of knotting the stomaches of both the giver and the receiver, don't they?  For the giver who is about to deliver the news, the days tick by so very slowly as they ponder what words to use that can lesson the impact of what they are about to say.  An invisible weight tethered to their heart wishing there was another way.
   For the receiver, a day that is zipping right along comes to a sudden stop as their mind races wondering what, oh what, can the news be?  Their imaginations run wild imagining all of the worst things.  The moment their ears first hear those words, their pulse quickens.  Their eyes search the face of the giver searching for clues.  They breath in but not out.
   Well, My Toy Garden friends, I have something to tell you and today is the day.  Um, well...hmm....for once my fingers are at a standstill at the keyboard.  How do I explain?   Perhaps like a bandaid to just rip off?  Perhaps to slowly reveal what is behind the creaking door?
      Imagining, designing, breathing life into My Toy Garden has been a great joy.  For the past 3 years, I've challenged myself in so many ways and learned a few lifetimes of lessons along the way.   I truly feel that God led me to open the store and those steps were part of the plan for my life.   That path is taking a new direction now and I believe that My Toy Garden is not part of that direction going forward.
     A little over a year ago, I stepped back a bit from the business to spend more time with my growing miracles, Lily and Nicholas.  They were 1 and 4 when I opened the store. This month they turn 4 and 7.  Wow.  While I love My Toy Garden dearly,  I love my children more.   Try though I have to balance the store and motherhood, it's been very difficult.  When I look back at my life, I want to be more proud that I raised strong children rather than a strong toy store.
    So, what now?  Want to buy a toy store?!  I'll make you a deal!  Really.   My Toy Garden has been privately listed for sale since last October.  If you or someone you know wants to take the reins from here, now is your chance.  My Toy Garden has become a beloved place in the community and I would love to find someone to take over.  I so appreciate the many very kind comments you make about how much you love the store.  I'm so thankful to have been part of special family events in your life and to have donated to local charities and programs.  I know it's very sad news for many of you that My Toy Garden is likely to not be here much longer.   If taking over My Toy Garden is something you want to explore more, just let me know.  Soon though please.
      In order to enjoy the summer with Lily and Nicholas, my plans are to start clearing the shelves as of today.   (Most everything is officially 15% off now)  If a buyer comes forward great!  If not, then all will be okay too. Either way, I'm looking forward to more time with my children soon.  I am sorry to let any of you down in any way.  I do hope you know how much I have cherished your support and kind words.  I also hope you understand that I must put my children first.
    A few other things to note:
- Next Friday, will be the last story time at My Toy Garden.  We'll enjoy The Enormous Carrot and do a fun Easter craft.  All other story times are cancelled.
- Additional markdowns will be taken as we go along.  I would invite you to stop by often the next few weeks or join us on FB to get the latest news on that.  
- All fixtures and furniture are for sale.  If you don't see a price on something and you think you want it, just ask!
-  There will be two more Society for Young Magicians Meetings held here.  One tonight and one on Thurs., May 8  They normally take the summer off.  Stay tuned for new location info for the fall from them.
-  Have you enjoyed reading the newsletters?  I do enjoy writing and appreciate hearing that many of you enjoy reading what I wrote.  I plan to continue to write and will do so at my new blog at www.theoddmom.com.  Come Follow me there to get the newest posts!
- This step would not be possible without the blessings of Wildtree.  Many of you know that as passionate as I am about child development and play, I am also passionate about nutrition.  Direct sales has been part of my life for many years and I am loving being back and, this time, with a company committed to helping families learn how to put a healthy meal on the table fast and easy.  In just 8 months, I've double promoted to Senior Team Leader with Wildtree and earn enough to be able to meet the financial obligations of leaving the toy store. If you have a dream that you think is impossible, talk to me.  There might be ways you can't or have not seen just yet. Anything truly is possible!  My Wildtree website to go explore more is www.mywildtree.com/janetp
- Many of you have asked when the next Wildtree Freezer Meal Workshop will be.  I've decided to host one last workshop at the store the end of May.  Let's do Get Your Grill On on Thurs., May 29 at 7 pm.   We'll get those freezers stocked and ready for summer before the kids are officially out of school!  See below for more details.
- Last, if the freezer meal workshop doesn't sound like the right fit for you right now, you can join in the Wildtree April Mystery Host Party happening right now until Sun., April 27.  Place an order online on my website under the Mystery Host Event and you could win all the free host credit that will be anywhere from $30 and up!  More info is found here.  

Whew, I think that's it....thank you so much for being part of this amazing journey!  I look forward to seeing you at least one more time and hopefully our paths will cross many more times in the months and years ahead.  It truly has been an honor to be part of your lives!
     
Sincerely,
Toylady Janet

Tangled and Frozen

      It happened again today.   It happened a few months ago and a few months before that and countless times over the last several years.  And yet it still surprises me.  Shocks me.  It makes me worry more and more for the future.
     Everywhere I looked today I was surrounded by a Frozen frenzy.    "Did you get your video?"  "I'm staring out the window waiting for the mail truck!  Where is it?! "  "I've called every store within a 3 hours drive and finally found her!"  "I paid a fortune on Amazon for the dress but I got it!"  "My daughter knows all the lyrics of all the songs...shoot, I do too!"  "Want to watch my 500 Youtube videos of Frozen songs?"
     This happened with the last "hot" thing and the one before that and the one before that.  Why is it that people go crazy for something that will, in a few short months, end up in their garage sale bin for next to nothing?  Why do they spend their hard earned dollars on something so fleeting?  Disney is tickled and singing Frozen tunes all the way to the bank.  Sales from the movie alone so far have exceeded $900 million.  Wait, think about that...$900 million dollars.   Oh the problems of this world we could solve with that kind of money funneled in other directions!!  Hunger.  Homelessness.  Illiteracy.  Crazy. Totally crazy.  As I've pondered this today through yet another frenzy, here's my two cents...

1)  We must have the latest to show our child we love them.  We want them to have what other children have so they know we love them.  I invite you to ponder...Is this really how we want to show love to our children?

2)  We must have the latest whatever so that we will fit in with what we perceive to be cool, to be like others, to not feel left out.  We like to be part of something bigger.  I invite you to ponder...Is that a group you really want to be part of and why or why not?  Look deeper at the whys of our actions.

3)  We must have the latest because we want to create special memories with our children that we hope will last a lifetime.  I invite you to ponder....What memories are we really creating?
  What will they really remember from the experience?

      What are we really teaching out children when we place such a high value on material things and go to such extremes to own them?   I invite you to ponder....what do our actions show is really most important in our lives?  Trends like this explode because of the masterful marketing that pulls on our emotions and weaknesses.   Many companies are much more concerned about how much money they can make and care little about at what cost to us, our families and our character.  This is a very scary, very slippery slope of consumerism.  I invite you to explore a website call [Commercial Free Childhood](http://www.commercialfreechildhood.org/)  to learn more about the research on marketing to children.

      I believe with all my heart that it can be different and needs to be different.    Your dollars decide that what companies thrive and survive.   I invite you to ponder what values and companies you are feeding with your dollars.  Are they companies that value relationship more than money?  Are they companies that value character traits such as creativity, patience, determination in healthy ways?  Spend with your mind as well as your heart and may the two be more and more in alignment with one another.  This generation and the next and the next depends on it.

Dad, Is This What It's Like?

Dear My Toy Garden Friends,

One of the most memorable stories I know of Joey goes like this...Another round of chemo just ahead in an endless journey of treatments and the mandatory fasting was in progress. Joey's stomach ached for food...gnawing at his mind and heart.

"Dad, is this what it's like?" Joey asked.

"It?" puzzled his father. The answer to come was unexpected and no one, except Joey, could have imagined the beauty that bloomed from the seed of that sentence.

"It," Joey pondered. "Is this what it feels like to be homeless?"

Silence..more silence as a father who had wrestled with so words so very many times in the past year prayed for the right words to come.

"Yes, Joey. I imagine it is."

"Dad, we can't let that be. We have to help." Help. From a little boy whose daily tasks of self care and survival were all consuming. Help from a little boy whose brain was under attack. Help. He knew he could though and help he did. From that conversation, grew Team Joey Million Meal Marathon held at Lucas Oil Stadium so that so many other children would not feel those pangs of hunger. We can learn much from Joey Keller...

(From the Pointe to a Cure website.) Joey Keller was born on July 4th, 2003 in Fort Wayne, Indiana. In the middle of a torrential downpour and huge booms of thunder, around 9pm, little Joseph entered the world. To his parents, this was a true miracle for they were told they would not be able to have children of their own. In that respect, Joey was a miracle from the get-go. In the fall of 2010 Joey was enjoying a normal childhood, busy with school work, sports, Legos, family and friends, when he began to have severe nausea in the mornings and after playing outside. After weeks of struggling and doctors doing tests, on November 21st, a CT scan finally revealed a golf ball size tumor in the posterior fossa (back) of Joey’s brain. He was rushed to Riley Children’s Hospital, and radiation was started immediately. The lab tests after the tumor resection confirmed Joey had medulloblastoma, a very hard to treat and aggressive type of pediatric cancer. Joey was already at stage 4 with dissemination down his spine. If they didn’t start treatment immediately, he would be in a coma within days. Joey came through the surgery with flying colors, actually asking the surgeon, while his head was still fixed to the operating table and they were closing the incision, “Is the surgery over yet?” It took a couple of weeks for him to come out the hospital, but they used an ambulance to transport him across the street to IU Simon Cancer Center for daily emergent radiation treatments. Eventually his energy, sight, and strength improved, allowing his amazing personality to again shine. Growing up, Joey was always focused on others. When his friends would come over to play at his house, he would offer his toys, food, or money to them, if he felt he had more than they did. At his soccer games, as soon as a teammate seemed upset or got hurt, Joey became focused on trying to help him feel better. At times, this forced the coach to put in another player because Joey didn’t ask permission; he just went with the hurt player or stayed with a player on the sidelines who was upset because he missed a goal or the team got beat. One of Joey’s parents’ favorite pictures of him, from a vacation, is of him with his hand on his cousin’s shoulder at a putt-putt course, comforting him after a tough round. He seemed to always gravitate to hurting people and to do whatever it took to make them feel better.

During Joey’s long months of chemotherapy, radiation, and hospital stays, there was no shortage of hurting people. Joey was always talking with and praying for these hurting kids and their families. Once, a boy and his family down the hall had received really bad news, and Joey could hear the boy crying. He immediately asked his dad to drive home and get a big Star Wars Lego set that Joey had saved for and give it to the boy, in an effort to cheer him up. On another occasion when friends came to visit Joey at his house, he found out that the boy his age was really into a certain kind of Legos that Joey had; when the boy mentioned that he didn’t have any of that particular set, Joey gave him what he had. His parents felt that for an 8 year old, going through the seemingly endless chemo, nausea, and physical therapy to learn to walk again, this was remarkable. It seemed that Joey had figured out, at his young age, that giving was truly more fun than receiving.

In the fall of 2011 Joey relapsed and began chemotherapy for recurrent disease. Those treatments only provided a temporary slowing of the tumors’ growth, and he began to lose control of his facial muscles; so the family and medical team decided to repeat radiation so he could continue to eat, talk, and show the world that wonderful smile that could light up a room. In late September 2012, he began having seizures, and the cancer progressed to a place where medicine had nothing left to offer. He slowly lost the ability to walk, to eat, to communicate, to remember the Legos he loved, to recognize his parents, and, on November 18, 2012, to breathe.

The Team Joey Program, through Heroes Foundation, gives fifty cents of every dollar toward pediatric cancer research and the other fifty cents toward buying and giving out Legos to any child battling cancer.

If he did and does make such a difference with his young life, what's holding you back? How can you use your gifts to help your passion?

With love, 
Toylady Janet

PS. For me, one of my great passions in this world is to do whatever I can to invite people to take a serious look at what causes such horrors as cancer and autism and other major health issues we face. I invite people to explore their healthcare, their chemicals in their environment and what is really in the food their eat. One conversation at a time, I'm convinced we can one day slow the growth of this horrors and one day, oh how sweet that day will be, see these trends reverse. Many answers are out there already if we only would peek from our cozy perches and look and learn and share. Thank you to all who have joined in the battle already! Welcome to the others.

Pearls from a Crabby Man's Wife

Dear My Toy Garden Friends,

Vacations are a flowing stream of memories created and captured and treasured. Our trip to Florida over the last few days was no different. Days filled with sand castles, wave jumping, lizard catching, crabs and seashells. As I sit tonight and reflect over the last 6 days visiting my husband's father and stepmother, it is not an image of my children playing that stands out the most though there are plenty of fun images to treasure. It is a comment uttered while perched on the top of a palm tree trunk on a sunny day at the beach. A comment that soaked into my heart like the warmth of the sun. It's amazing how God puts us in the right place at the right time to hear what we most need to hear. This week, I share her words so that they may be just what you need to hear as well.

Sam, my father-n-law, has a talent for growing peppers and has a refrigerator full of his culinary creations. His personality is as peppery. He reads a great deal, trimming out articles from magazines and newspaper, underlining and highlighting them and gathering them together in a great brain mass of paper jumbled across the kitchen counter. He is quick to point out that he is right and you are wrong. He knows best and, if you just listen to him, all will be well. A jab there. A poke there. Frequently criticizing but seldom aware of it. Not an easy man to be married to.

My beach buddy yesterday was his wife of 40 years, Chris. I've wondered at the mystery of how this woman could be married to this man after all the years putting up with so much. Now I know her secret.

Just down the beach a young couple seemed to be enjoying capturing their visit to the beach with a series of photos. "Ah, young love," I commented.

"Young love? Nah. I'd rather have old love. It's much better. It's calm. It's sure. It's strong."

"It's all about compromise," she continued. "If you are married to a man who is no good, then move on. If you are married to a good man, you compromise and make it work." Compromise...such a hard word in this egocentric world of I must be right and you must be wrong. Compromise...challenging in this quest to find the perfect partner only to learn that truly, no one is perfect. Compromise...the forgiving, the letting go, the seeking peace, the lifting up of the other. Compromise....the give and take that makes love grow from young love to old love...calm. Sure. Strong. Thank you Chris for the gift of love....true love that lasts. I can think of no greater gift to give ourselves or model for our children.

Playfully, 
Toylady Janet

My Mother's Last Words

Dear My Toy Garden friends,

Uncle Allen was gone. One of those fluke things. A spot was noticed on his lung. A routine biopsy and, in a blink, he was gone. The sad phones calls began to share the news with family and friends. Who would tell Aunt Verina though?

"Not I," said the son.

"Not I," said the daughter. Who? No one wanted to call and tell my mom that her brother had passed away.

My mother, the youngest in her family of five, lived a very challenging life growing up. Years of abuse on many levels had left her with emotional scars that are so hard to heal. Her explosive outbursts toward family in fast food restaurants, grocery stores and special gatherings had led to a very cautious approach of her. After many years of seeking to understand her, to support her and to love her in spite of the anger, I choose to distance myself. Sadly the distance grew not only from her but from the rest of my family as well.

Years passed...I became a mom....Uncle Allen was gone. A chance to come home to visit...perhaps reconnect. Dare I? Could things be different? Could a daughter feel her mother's love at long last? Mom learned of his passing and, to the amazement of all, behaved admirably....calling on his wife with her regrets....visiting the funeral home to say her goodbyes...all without a moment of drama. A major, major milestone for her. I was so proud...so very proud as I knew how very difficult it must have been for her. So proud I wanted her to know. Not in a letter. Not on the phone but with my eyes. With my heartfelt words. Perhaps this could begin to melt the ice between us.

With my infant daughter asleep in the backseat, I took a deep breath and slowed at her home. The rocks scattering beneath my tires, the car came to a stop. My heart like a butterfly trapped in a shoebox. A pause of my hand on the car door handle and a deep breath, I took the first step toward the house. As my hand raised to knock, the door opened and there she was. Wow. Had that many years really passed? Mom. With a quiver in my voice, the words rushed out, "Mom. I'm so proud of you." The sentences tumbled out as I attempted to tell her what I so wished for her to hear. Hope perching on my shoulder. I finished. The silence stretched around my heart. And then....bam. There it was just as I'd seen so many times before. Her anger. Swelling and gushing and swelling again...a storm of words intended to hurt. I stumbled off the steps and to my car her final words like arrows behind me. "Get the h... out of my house. Get the h...out of my life and don't ever f.... come back." My Mom's last words I heard.

I share this story this week for those like me and I've learned over the years that there are many of you out there. Those like me who are truly happy for people who get to enjoy the sweet experience of close family but whose hearts ache when they see family picnics, Mother's day gushes on Facebook, are invited to weddings of friends with rich family traditions. For those like me who long for their children to enjoy a large close family but know it can't ever be. Such a tangled web of emotions there are. To you, like me, I want to say, you are not alone. While friends can never fully take the place of your family, you are loved and you are important to many people out there. You are wonderful just the way you are no matter what your family is like. Bless and release but know that you are human and it's okay for the tears to fall from time to time.

I share this story this week for those of you who do enjoy amazing families so that you can be aware of those around you and perhaps notice the pain on another's heart so that you can offer a hug, a smile, a loving word of comfort. You can make a difference.

Most importantly, I share this story with you this week to help you understand that My Toy Garden is about so much more than selling toys. I so desire for children today to grow up connected to their families and to feel unconditional love. Love that comes from spending quality time with one another like playing a game, playing catch, doing a puzzle, caring for one another. In this rush, rush, rush world we choose to immerse ourselves in, what truly matters to you? What example are you setting for the children in your life? Let's make the most of today so the tomorrows will be full of love for all.

With Love, 
Toylady Janet

Where is She? Where is She!

Dear My Toy Garden friends,
     The women were lounging inside.  The men were lounging outside.  How nice to have visiting family all together connecting and enjoying the start of another beautiful day.  Her mom came downstairs and slowly a puzzled look crossed her face.  "Where is she?"  Then, "Where is she!!"   Mom thought the toddler was downstairs. The women thought she was upstairs.  Now, no one knew where she was.  And there was a pool and a canal right outside the door.  The women searched the house.  The mom raced to the water as the tentacles wrapped around her stomach.  No.  No.  Please no.  Her eyes scanned the water up and down searching for any sign of struggle.  Please no.  Agonizing minutes later, one of the women calls that she has been found.  Upstairs.  In a closed room.  Happily playing.  Relief washes over the Mom as she realizes her little daughter is safe.
     Can you relate to this real life experience of my nephew's wife on their recent trip to Michigan?  Have you felt that knot of fear as you search for your child knowing there is water near by?  You don't have to any more thanks to a new business that just opened in [Carmel called Goldfish Swim School.]Not only is this a super cool place that parents and children will want to hang out in but teaching children safety in the water is their main focus.  The manager, Tom, told me a tale of one of their students who fell into a lake unnoticed by his family.  When they finally discovered him, he was contentedly floating on his back waiting for them.  Wouldn't it be great to know your child knew how to do that?  Oh yeah!
    Their facility located in the Merchant Square shopping center just west of the Marsh near Keystone and 116th is beautiful!  Tiki huts, surfboard benches, private dressing rooms, a mural full of ocean friends and more await your discovery!  The water and air in the pool room is kept at a tropical 90 degrees so there is no shivers in or out of the water.  They offer perpetual classes for 4 mos to 12 yrs old as well as open swim times and birthday parties.  Such a fun place!  I'm delighted to welcome them to the neighborhood!  Here are some swimming tips I learned from my visit there.  Summer is coming and soon it'll be time to be water wise.
     1.  Go slow - Some children need time to get used to the water.  Goldfish Swim School offers perpetual lessons so the child is in the water 30 mins a week every week until they (not a calendar or teacher) show they are ready to move on.  All children learn at different rates so I love this approach!
     2.  Experiment with ways to get their face wet.   Do not just dunk a child under water in a trial by fire experience.  Explore ways to get their face wet using scoops to pour over their head, strainers, squirters and goggles.
     3.  Distract them.  When encouraging them to float on their back, distract them by looking at things on the ceiling, sing a favorite song, invite them to look in a mirror.
     4.  When teaching them to swim unassisted, do not be the goal to swim to.  Teach them to swim to a solid object like a wall a short distance away instead.  They know you can come rescue them if they need it.  If it's an inanimate object, they'll work harder to get from one side to the other.  Goldfish Swim School uses "islands" made of platforms to teach this important skill.  Brilliant!  [Their blog has other helpful information on swimming as well.]
    Knowing your child is safe in the water anytime, anywhere is peace of mind that is priceless and I'm so glad Goldfish is now around the corner from My Toy Garden to help families! Welcome guys!
Playfully,
Toylady Janet

The Dangerous Tomato

Dear My Toy Garden friends,

Poor Nicholas. His rash was back again and even worse than before. A visit to our pediatrician made a tube of steroid cream appear but the rash to not disappear. I knew enough about health and the power of the human body to heal itself if allowed to at that point to know unless I found the root cause of the rash, it would not go away. We began to watch closely what he ate and discovered the rash seemed to be connected to dairy. Hmmph and yeah! We switched to almond mild...a very easy switch I must say... and the rash cleared a bit...but returned worse than ever. The back of his legs were raised, very itchy, bloody in spots where he could not stop scratching. More pondering and another discovery. The rash seemed to be connected to, of all odd things, tomatoes. Thankful for another non pharmaceutical solution, we eliminated tomatoes and the rash improved but would not go away. Why? We switched to a new pediatrician with a foot in the traditional medicine world and the holistic world who turned out to be a great detective. Tomatoes, she told us, were a member of a group of vegetables called Nightshades and included eggplant, potato, onion and green peppers. Green peppers? Nicholas loved green peppers and would eat them like apples. This is when I learned the craved food is often the source of trouble. After NAET testing and treatments (a subject for 6 more newsletters), we eliminated onions and green peppers as well and the rash faded away.

Based on this experience and the way my daughter's persistent ear infection disappeared once and for all with a gluten free diet, I'm absolutely convinced that nutrition is THE key to restoring health for many children. I'm super excited to have nutritionist Gina Montgomery joining us for a Parent Workshop this month! She'll be with us THIS THURSDAY from 6-7 pm!

I'm also very excited to have in stock, the book pictured below - Cure Your Child With Food by Kelly Dorfman, MS, LND. I've been gobbling it up since I grabbed a copy and am loving it! Tons of practical, well researched information and very helpful tips on what to do to help with a huge host of challenges including picky eating, reflux, stomachaches, ear infections, Constipation, Failure to Grow, Rashes, Sleeplessness, Mood Disorder, ADHD, SPD, Hyperactivity, Speech Delays and much more!

Are you doing your Power 10 each day to learn something new? This book and the topic of nutrition will reap you and your family lifelong benefits. Surely that is worth 10 minutes of time in your day! Stop by My Toy Garden anytime to chat and brainstorm together! Thank you for being part of the conversations that make a difference!

Playfully,
Toylady Janet

Be Houdini in Your Kitchn

    The errands of the day were done.  The tasks completed and before us was a treasure box of 30 minutes before bedtime.  What were we to do with such a gift?  Below us in the basement lay the small mountain of birthday gifts recently unwrapped awaiting just such an opportunity.  Lily headed downstairs knowing just which one she wanted to explore first.  She'd thought about it all day hoping there would be time to work on it together with me.  A few moments later, her toothless smiling face emerged and she was clutching the box of science experiments she'd chosen for her birthday bucket.  She was so excited someone has chosen it for her.  
      She read through the various choices of experiments and zeroed in on one.  In moments we had gathered our materials:  baking soda, water, grape juice, paper, paintbrush, cotton balls, beakers and measuring cups and spoons.  We mixed the baking soda and water together and, with her tongue carefully tucked to one side, she spelled out her secret message with the paintbrush.  We let it dry for a bit while we chose another experiment to explore.   Finally, with cotton ball in hand, she dipped it in the grape juice and dabbed it on the paper.  Like magic the letters appeared spelling out, "I Love You".  Moments like that last a lifetime.  I wonder which one we'll do tonight!  
    As part of my many years in the classroom, I had the pleasure of creating and running a K-5 science lab.  Science is like magic to children and they love to explore it!  It is far from the dusty beakers and chemical formulas that may be echoing in your minds.  It's the core of curiosity.  The need to explore the world.  The ying and yang of questions that lead to answers that lead to more questions to explore.  I invite you this week to look at your kitchen a bit differently and have some science fun with us!  It's easy.  I promise.  Some of my favorites are below!  I'd love to hear more about yours on our Facebook page!

  1.  Whose on Bottom?  
     Grab a clear drinking glass or other slender clear glass container.  Gather 5-7 liquids from your kitchen:  milk, oil, syrup, dish soap, pickle juice, mustard, anything will do.  Help your child pour a layer of it in the glass.  Then carefully add a 2nd liquid and watch to see if it sits on top of the first one, sinks to the bottom or mixes together with it.  Follow with a 3rd one carefully. Then a 4th, etc.  Each liquid has it's own density and will rest in their scientific order.  Check out the picture below for one fun glass of liquid layers.  Notice they added a few solids as well for more density explorations.  Fun!

2.  Milk Fireworks
     Fill a shallow dish like a pie pan with milk.  Carefully add 3-4 drops of blue food coloring on one side.  Carefully add 3-4 drops of yellow food coloring to the other side.  Next put some dish soap on your fingertip and then place your finger in the milk next to one of the food coloring pools. What happens?  Try this also with water and pepper.  Science is magic!

3.   Best Volcano ever
     Kids never tire of volcanos especially ones that shoot really high.  The classic experiment of mixing baking soda and vinegar together is so fun to do.  To make your volcano really shoot high, find a funnel that will fit snugly over a bottom container.  If you quickly snap the funnel over the top after adding the vinegar to the baking soda, the pressure will build and shoot the volcano way up high through the funnel.   Love it!  I confess that this was actually the unity ceremony when my husband and I married complete with test tubes of pink and blue liquids, a graduated cylindar and ribbons.   True story.  :-)  

4.  Rise Young Egg Rise!  
      Be a Houdini in your own kitchen and make an egg rise all by itself.  Place an egg in a glass of water.  Slowly begin to sprinkle salt in the glass.  Sprinkle more salt and more....watch what happens.  Tada!  Now how to make that work with a lady?

5.  PeYew!  
     Grab some 3x5 index cards, some glue and a collection of fun smells from the spice cabinet.   Put some glue on one side of the card and cover it with a spice such as garlic, cinnamon, oregano, etc.  Label it.  Then either let littles ones explore the myriad of smells or older children can play a blind man's bluff guessing game with the cards.

6.  Green = ? + ?
    Grab a coffee filter and a secondary color marker (purple, green or orange).  Cut a strip from the coffee filter and color a dot with one of the markers about half way up it.  Place the bottom edge in water and observe what happens.  Great color unmixing experiment!  Another classic one is to put a white flower in food coloring and see what happens.  Last year, Lily and I spliced the stem of a carnation and put half of it in yellow water and half into blue water.  What do you think happened?  

Playfully, 
Toylady Janet